The Cabbage Patch Kids

I wrote a story the other day dedicated to my love of cabbage patch kids when I was younger. I have kept them all through the years along with an original Teddy Ruxpin bear a handful of pound puppies and also a hug-a-lot bear whose heart only stopped beating a year or two ago.

No. I'm not crazy. Let me explain to those of you who weren't born in the 80's. Hug-a-lot bear was a semi-large stuffed bear whom upon squeezing his chest made a "thump-thump-thump" sound like a heart beating. He. Was. Awesome; Unlike my Teddy Ruxpin bear who could have been just as awesome if not more so, but ended up never working properly. This was the beginning of the innovative-ness of talking toys and instead of him talking in his sweet, positive (possibly gay?) voice that I knew and loved from the cartoon, he sounded more like a possessed pedifile who wanted to eat my brains like a zombie.

You may wonder why I would keep all of these treasures years later. You might even think that I've kept them for nostalgia alone or even to have them to give to my own children. I'm not sure if any of these quite describe the reasoning behind taking up too much closet space. Here is the real truth behind the matter:

Creepy? Yes. And....

I. Don't. Want. To Die. 

Never will I risk the chance of giving these things away and later waking up one night with one or all of them leering over me with a knife. I'll take my chances with keeping them safely stored in my great grandfather's old trunk. At least there, I know where they are...

 "My Name is Talky Tina and I am going to kill you"

"Twilight Zone" Living Doll